I am confused about my gender identity, what am I?

This is why there are gender therapists. Some people are easily identifiable as they clearly to one end of the scale or the other. But there are many shades of grey when it comes to gender identity and you appear to be somewhere in the middle to me. It also sounds to me like you may have some denial going on as well. Find a gender therapist they will be able to quickly find out where to fit in.